I Am Here to Have the Best Life Possible Now

bestlife“I Am Here to Have the Best Life Possible Now”

Not in the future, not in the past, but today, today is the time to make this decision.

If we commit to this decision, we will start to live the life we were supposed to live. Even if you have an illness today, or if you are feeling overwhelmed for your duties, you can still have the best life of whatever the situation you are dealing with now.

When we commit to this, we start to see things different. A problem can not be solved with the same mind that created it. But when we commit to have the best life possible for this here and now, we are changing our minds, therefore , we can now solve our problems with a new mind.

Dr. Wayne W. Dyer says:

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change

And that it not only a word game, it goes beyond our comprehension, because we affect our surroundings, the people around us, situations, the environment, etc. with our thoughts, but most important with our feelings. So, when you commit to have the best life possible you can imagine, you are making changes in your thoughts, your mind and your feelings. You are opening yourself to possibilities you were not able to see before. Situations will change, people  will change, problems will get solved.

You will start to live a new life when you make the commitment.

You will be having the best life possible for the situations you are living now.

God Blesses You

Emotions Are The Key to Memory

Emotions are catalyzers for the brain. Emotions let the brain know you are into something important. When something is important for the brain, the brain makes an effort to remember it. There are more neuron connections involved in the brain with emotions than with simple ideas.

coffee

Let’s see an example about it. You wake up in the morning, take a shower and head to work early in the morning. As you are early this morning, you decide to go to the new coffee shop on your way to work and buy yourself a cup of coffee, as you are leaving, there is this woman talking on the phone entering in the coffee shop. As she is talking she manages to push, instead of pulling it. The door by the way has a huge “pull” sign on it. You were leaving and because she pushed the door so fast, you didn’t have a chance to react and the coffee splits all over your white shirt.

She was in such a hurry that she didn’t even notice the incident, she enters the shop and heads straight ahead into the counter. You look at her with a silent claim in your eyes, but she doesn’t even notice you.

You grab a bunch of napkins and leave the coffee shop. By now it is not early anymore, so you cannot go back to your house and put on another shirt, so you head out to work thinking about all the explanations you will have to tell your co-workers all day long, but specially what you are going to say to the client you will meet this afternoon.

I am sure that if by the end of the day I would ask you what dress was the woman that pushes your coffee in the morning, or a description of herself. You wouldn’t need much to give me the detailed description of her, and of course of all the incident in the morning. Perhaps you also would easily remember what you told your client, and what he said back.

But If I ask you how much did you pay for the coffee, or where did you leave your car keys when you arrived to your house, or how many emails you answered in the morning, chances are you would have trouble remembering most of those. Not because they were not important, some may, some may not, but the key is that those things did not have an emotion and the coffee incident had. It was also a powerful experience, not because of the consequences, but because it involved an emotion.

Most of the things we can’t seem to remember are because there wasn’t an emotion involved. You can’t remember where you put your keys or your cell phone, because you just did it. You have to call your own number to hear where you left it. In first instance that happens because you were not paying attention, probably because you were putting your attention on your thoughts, and not on the action itself. This happens to everyone all the time, but what about when she made you spill your coffee, an emotion arises and then you are not only paying attention, but you are also telling your brain to remember that, because it is important. If you would have left the shop a few seconds before, you wold probably may not even notice the person entering the shop, as it happens so many times during your every day activities.

That is also the reason because when we get angry or we are worrying for something important, we keep thinking about it, because it is an emotion the one telling the brain to remember it. Problem here is that with every time you remember it in your brain, you experience the same emotion again, with the same chemical experience inside your body, but also every time your brain is making stronger connections in your brain.

When you really want to remember something important, you can try to remember it, while you bring a powerful emotion, even if it doesn’t have anything to do with what you are remembering. Emotions are the key to Memory.

God Bless You.

Breaking the habit of trying to be right all the time

White-Tail-Deer-fight_900Here are some extracts of Judith E. Glaser’s blog Your Brain Is Hooked on Being Right,which was also featured at USA TODAY

http://blogs.hbr.org/cs/2013/02/break_your_addiction_to_being.html

In situations of high stress, fear or distrust, the hormone and neurotransmitter cortisol floods the brain. Executive functions that help us with advanced thought processes like strategy, trust building, and compassion shut down. And the amygdala, our instinctive brain, takes over. The body makes a chemical choice about how best to protect itself — in this case from the shame and loss of power associated with being wrong — and as a result is unable to regulate its emotions or handle the gaps between expectations and reality.

That’s partly due to another neurochemical process. When you argue and win, your brain floods with different hormones: adrenaline and dopamine, which makes you feel good, dominant, even invincible. It’s a the feeling any of us would want to replicate. So the next time we’re in a tense situation, we fight again. We get addicted to being right.

Luckily, there’s another hormone that can feel just as good as adrenaline: oxytocin. It’s activated by human connection and it opens up the networks in our executive brain, or prefrontal cortex, further increasing our ability to trust and open ourselves to sharing.

Our Brain is hooked on being right most of the time, trying constantly to defend what we believe we are or what we have: our possessions,our title, our career, our image,etc.

But if we are in auto pilot mode all of the time, how can we change that and break the habit of being right? First we need to be aware of that, we need to realize every time we are in a discussion, or just talking with someone, and we start to feel the emotion of anger in our bodies, that is the time to realize we are feeling it, because we have just hooked in defending our point of view.

After we realized that, then we need to ask ourselves this:

What if?

What if the other person is right?, What if I am not right? What would it happen if I would agree with the other person? What if I could listen with empathy?

By doing this, your break the pattern of defending yourself, and activate the Oxytocin in your body, opening your state of mind and your awareness, and experiencing bliss instead of anxiety. By doing that you are giving the first step in creating a new habit, and with every time you do it, the habit reaffirms, until you break the old habit, because an old habit that is not used, dissolves in our brain, giving space to the new habit, which instead of anxiety, gives us happiness.

Hole in the Fence

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“There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there.”

As the story tells, when we get angry, we say or do things that may hurt others, and that wound could stay forever. The principle is simple, but it may not be that easy to get rid of anger, not easy, but possible.

We are used to get angry on a daily basis, and that is because we have been doing that for many years, so by now our brain has long term connection on the emotion of anger, it even has specific chemicals which are sent to our cells every time we get angry.

Every time we got angry in the past, a connection was reinforced in our brain, then after so many times we have reinforced the emotion, the neurons in our brain have formed a long term relationship.

Basically we do not have control of our anger, it comes out of our brain naturally. But we can change that. Just as the brain has the ability to create long term relations, it also has the capacity to forget those connections. When neuron connections are not used on a daily basis, they loose their long term relationship, therefore we can rewire our brain with new connections.

The question would be, If we have no control over our anger, how can we stop getting angry and rewire our brain?

Here is the trick; every time you are aware of an emotion, the connection looses power. Every time we KNOW we reacted because we were programmed to do so, the connection get weaker.

In addition if we know the real reason because we are getting angry, our conscious mind will start to make new connections, because now we know the reason, and that will give us control of the situation in future events.

If we believe there are many things outside which can make us angry,we will find it so hard to work with the emotion, but if we understand that in essence anger is one of the simplest emotions we have, and most of the times we experience it, is only for one reason inside us and not outside, then we will be able to rewire our brains.

The reason most of the times we get mad is because we want to be right.

So next time you get angry, be aware of it, and look underneath the emotion to find out the reason you got angry, that may lead you to make a new program in your brain, and help you be in control of your emotions, without having to reprehend them. You will have a more peaceful life.

Blessing

Tapping. A “new” way to dissolve your problems

Let me start by giving the definition of TAPPING:

Tapping Thought Field Therapy, or TFT, is a fringe psychological treatment developed by an American psychologist, Roger Callahan. Its proposes that it can heal a variety of mental and physical ailments through specialized “tapping” with the fingers at meridian points on the upper body and hands.

Tapping was first used to reduce the stress levels, but eventually, some found out that when you release the tension of your body, then other things start to improve as well.

Tapping has been around for some years, but in the last couple of years, several big names in Self-Improving have been talking, teaching and writing about tapping: Jack Canfield, Cheryl Richardson, Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer, Gabrielle Bernstein among others

Tapping works in two ways.

Firs is the release of tension on the meridians, because as Callahan claimed, each perturbation we have is encoded information contained in the “thought field”( the energy field created by positive or negative thoughts). Our thought field, changes constantly, because it is connected to a particular problem, and is activated by thinking about that problem. These perturbations have a lot to do in the creation of negative emotions and that each perturbation corresponds to a meridian point on the body. Therefore in order to eliminate the emotional upset, a precise sequence of meridian points must be tapped. By tapping we unblock the flow of energy, in other words it balances the flow of vital energy in our lives.

Second is because we speak while we tap, this is a way to “give words to the emotion”, this is a simple but powerful way to transform our lives. Most of the times we feel some kind if anxiety, we are not aware about what is really the cause of that anxiety. When we “know” the origin of our anxiety, we are able to work it. If we can see the problem that is producing the anxiety, the problem starts to loose power over our bodies(remember, our brain has the ability to increase the size of any problem, by thinking about the problem and not the possible solution).

tapping_points_diagram

Nowadays, there are a lot of information about tapping, and it could be used for many problems, and not only to reduce stress. You could also find information on how to do the tapping to solve many problems:

-WEIGHT LOSS
-ANXIETY IN CHILDREN
-ANGER
-RELATIONSHIPS
-IMPROVE EYE SIGHT
-ABUNDANCE

Does it really work?

The answer for me is simple: Try it for yourself, and find out if it works your you, and if it does, then you have just found new powerful techniques that will help you live a happier and less stressed life. If it does not work for you, then you have one less thing to try in order to have a happier life.

God Bless You

For more information, you could go to:

http://www.thetappingsolution.com

Praying for the families in Newton Connecticut

Sandy-Hook-Connecticut-shooting-vigil-2-jpgWhat happened last weekend in Newton, left us speechless, even President Obama was in tears in his message to the nation.

I talked to some people that is afraid it could happen to their children, or to them, they fear it could repeat again somewhere else.

After what happened there, several emotions arise in us; anger, fear, doubt. What these emotions have in common is fear.

Then after we experience fear we start to change that emotion to anger, some people is angry at the Government, because the law that aloud people to buy guns. If you go to a superstore, you are able to easily buy a gun, but you are not allowed to buy penicillin without a prescription. Some are angry with the one that did it, or with their parents.

But being angry won’t help to improve that situation unless we initiate some action based on love not hate, unless we fight for what we believe it could be achieved, instead of what we hate.

Mother Teresa answered said :

I will never attend an anti-war rally; if you have a peace rally, invite me.

We can’t fight what happened there with anger, because anger is what started this in the first place. That anger someone had been accumulating for years, manifested in a terrible way. We need to leave anger aside and learn from what happened there, and do something about it.

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we need to keep working so kids at schools are not bullied, which has been one thing recurrent in people with that kind of behavior

If we want to change something, we need to change it with love, from the love that maybe this person didn’t have or didn’t believe they have.

To the families of the children, it is not possible for me to say something that could help them, just to pray for them, and pray that they find peace in their hearts soon.

My prayers are that in their hearts they could understand this principle of a Course in Miracles:

“Only love is real. Fear is not”

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/oprahradio/A-Course-in-Miracles-Lesson-27#ixzz2FL1HFamF
God Bless you

Do you really love your spouse?

Do you really love your spouse?

That is the title of a video I just got from You Tube, and I decided I would write a new post about it.
Then I realized that the video speaks from itself, and that it will speak to each one personally, and each one will get something out of that video, so I decided I wouldn’t interfiere with its message, and I would let it speak directly to you.

Play Video

I only have one question for you to thing about it, after you have finished it:

What did the video tell you?

God Bless You

Live as You are Dying

Death is something that bothers our minds so many times during our lives, but death could be a great teacher too.

Through many cultures there has been a tremendous connection with death and wisdom. In some of them there is the belief that you should experience your own death, or in other words to embrace your own death in order to live this life fully, and only by embracing your death you would be able to open your wisdom and live a fearless life.

Althouugh there are certain techniques for doing so, they are not simple nor easy to accomplish. Not that I recomend trying them, but we can learn from their teachings and try to apply that to our lives.

One thing you could do is start by something simple but proffound at the same time:

“Live this moment as if it would be the last one you have”

When a young men who later became a saint was studying to become a priest, he was playing pool with the other students and one of the teachers. The teacher asked them this question:

“What would you do if you would now you were going to die in a couple of hours?”

The faces of the students changed from joy to fear when they thought about the question. There were different answers from the students:

-I will go to my family and say goodbye to them.
– I will go to the priest to have a confession of my sins.
-I will go to write down my testament.
-I will go and forgive my parents, and my friends.
-I will go and ask for forgiveness to my enemies.

But the expression of this young man remained calm even after the answers from his fellows. When the teacher noticed that he asked him

“What would you do?”

He answered

“I will keep doing what I am doing now, I will continue playing”

Not that he didn’t have anyting to leave to others or someone to say goodbye, but he was living the only moment he had; the present moment, and he lived in the present moment all the time, he was good with God, with others and with himself. He didn’t have any pending issues with anybody.

His teaching is so profound that it isn’t easy to put it in words, neither it is to put it in practice, but I really wish for you that if one day somebody would ask you; What would you do if you would now you were going to die in a couple of hours? I hope you are able to answer.

“I will keep doing what I am doing now”

God Bless You

I am also sharing this time an excerpt from my upcoming book “Interview with God”

“When people dies, at the moment they leave their bodies and enter in to my Love, I always ask each one if they would like to go back to earth and not to die at that moment. With the exception of few ones that want to go back and finish their missions, everybody decides to stay with Me instead of going back, because they are finally experiencing the real spirit they are. They are experiencing the Love they are made of, and they can’t let it go, they embrace that Love and feel it as it is, as it really is, with all the magnificence that you could never imagine while you are on earth, but that your soul could feel for moments while you are alive on earth.”

10 principles to a peaceful life

We are trying to control everything in life, but if we could learn we can let God do His job we would have a more relaxed and peaceful trip in this life, where joy would come easily, and we would enjoy every moment in our lives.

A simple way to understand this is comparing our trip in life with a trip on a plane.

1. Relax: This may sound so simple, but in this busy life we have created for ourselves, everything seems to be an struggle, we thing that we need to worry about everything in order to care about everything, but we could accomplish much more if we do everything in a relaxed mode, we could live healthier and do more, and yes give ourselves some time everyday just to relax. You wouldn’t have to go to the doctor as often, and eventually you would find more time for your self to relax.

2. Enjoy the view: You may ask What view? That is because we thing there is nothing going on out there, because we are so immerse in our thoughts all the time that we don’t have a second to look outside, but let me tell you; there is always something going on outside, there is something amazing out there, you just need to open your eyes, and close your mind and just look, see all the textures, colors, then see the trees, flowers, clouds, blue skies, sunlight, rain, snow, you will be amazed how many things are out there that you didn’t notice before

3. For sure someone is there to help you: There is someone that is more than happy to help you. Kindness is a quality of humans, we all have kindness and compassion inside of us, though some may show it and others will never do, you can always find the right people to help you, and if you think you can’t find anyone to help you, then go outside, open you arms and say to the sky “I need help”, and you will have it.

The Pilot who always knows what He is doing, let Him do the job.

4. There is a pilot and crew just to take you safe to your destination: There is always, in every moment of your life the ultimate Pilot who always knows what he is doing, let Him do the job, when you are on an airplane you don’t go with the pilot and say ” I think you are going too far east” you trust the pilot all the time, because you know that he knows, if not then you wouldn’t had purchased a ticket,if you wouldn’t trust the pilot. Now imagine what God knows compared to the pilot; trust God.

5. Breathe: All right we are always breathing, but breathing consciously makes a big difference, not only will make you feel relaxed, but it will make you be aware of yourself.

6. If something goes wrong there are face masks and life vests to help you: Sometimes things can go wrong, sometimes the unexpected can happen, but be sure that God would never send you something you could’t deal with, he will always provide you with whatever you need at that moment.

7. You were meant to fly: Sounds like a cliché, but we all were meant to be something great, and most of the times greater than we think we are. You can achieve great things if you believe you can. Wayne Dyer says you could accomplish things beyond your wildest dreams.

8. This is the only trip you have in this moment and only you are the only one that can choose to enjoy it or not: Now is unique and is the only moment you have, not what you had or what you will have in the future,you just have this moment to work with, and you are the only one that could decide to enjoy it or to complain about it, that doesn’t mean you cannot change things, if you don’t like something, this is the moment to change it instead of complaining about it, it is your choice.

9. Bad weather may shake the plane but be sure the sun is always behind the clouds: If you can’t see the sun it doesn’t mean it isn’t out there, so even if you forget about God in your cloudy days, you could be sure He is always there, He will never leave you and will always think about you, even if you don’t.

10. There are many passengers but only one plane we are one with the plane at this moment: We are all connected, we are one in our deepest selfs, we are not separated from the others, not because we have different bodies it means we are separated from the others, the ego is the one that makes you think that, and that feeling of separation is the cause of the suffering in this world, so if you could comprehend the oneness of everything you would have a peaceful and happy trip. I Hope you have it.

God Bless You
James Fontaine

Learning to be Happy

Learning happiness in Harvard:

Happiness is the desire of any person,

But often do not know how to achieve it. Therefore, Harvard University designed a course helping to achieve that state, a class that has become one of the most popular of that prestigious seat of learning.

The class is dictated by Tal Ben-Shahar.

Tal Ben-Shahar is an author and lecturer at Harvard University. He currently teaches the largest course at Harvard on “Positive Psychology” and the third largest on “The Psychology of Leadership”–with a total of over 1,400 students.

The course is based on field surveys and studies on the characteristics and components to living happily.

Therein Ben-Shahar, also known as the guru of happiness, provides 13 tips to help achieve it. They are quite simple and easy tips to follow.

And here they are.

1. 30 minutes of exercise
All experts agree that physical activity is as good as an antidepressant to improve mood. Thirty minutes exercise are the best antidote to sadness and stress.

2. Breakfast is the key
Some people skip breakfast because they do not have time or do not want fat. Studies show that breakfast helps to have energy, thinking and successfully perform the activities.

3. Thank the good
Write down 10 things you have in your life that give you happiness. When we make a gratitude list, we force ourselves to focus on good things.

4. Be assertive
Ask for what you really want and say what you think. It has been shown to be assertive helps improve self-esteem.

5. Spend on experiences
Spend your money on experiences, not things. 75 percent of people feel happier when they invest their money on travel, courses and classes. In contrast, only 34 percent say they feel happier when they buy things, except if needed.

6. Do not delay
‘Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today’. Studies show that there is more anxiety and tension the more delayed.

7. Be polite and smile
Always greet and be kind to others. Just smile changes the mood. In addition, most people will value to be treated better.

8. Watch your posture
Walk straight with your shoulders back slightly and looked up at the front helps to maintain a good mood.

9. Music is essential
It is proven that listening to music awakens desire to sing and dance, which makes life merry.

10. Think about what you eat
What you eat has a major impact on your mood. For this reason, it is advisable to eat something light every three or four hours order to maintain stable glucose levels. Do not skip meals and avoid excess sugar and white flour. Eat everything and vary the
foods.

11. Accept failure
Accept failure as part of life, go ahead and learn from it.

12. Take care of your appearance
41 percent of people say they feel happier when they think they look good.

13. Surround yourself with your memories
Paste pleasant memories, phrases and pictures of their loved ones everywhere, in your fridge, on your computer, on your desktop … Surround yourself with things that remind you of good times.

Big think

God Bless You