Repressed emotions may manifest as illness.

FOR EVERY MINUTE

Emotions are to be channeled or expressed. Every emotion in our body has a meaning, there aren’t bad or good emotions, every one has a reason to exist.

There are consequences if you express your emotions in a wrong way. If you got angry with your spouse, and you say things you would regret later, then you have to live with the consequences of expressing your anger in that way.

If you yell at your boss because you got mad at him, there is a chance you get fired, and live the consequences of your reaction to anger.

If you express your emotions the wrong way, you may not like the consequences of your acts. But even worst than expressing your emotions the wrong way is to repress the emotions.

The meaning of repress is to press it again, in this case pressing it again to the inside of the body, which means not letting it out. Some call it eating the emotion, and they are right in a way, you are eating the expression of the emotion to the inside.

Is like yelling to yourself instead of yelling to your boss, or saying things you’ll regret to you instead of your spouse.


As we talked before, every emotion has a purpose, and a chemical reaction in your body. When you reprehend an emotion, let’s say anger or resentment, then your body is not able to release the chemicals in your body released by the felling of the emotion. Those chemicals are completely harmless to your body if they are released properly (your body knows exactly how to do that), but when you repress the emotion, you are not letting your body release those chemicals, and residuals of those chemicals, are going to stay in every cell of your body, until they find a way out.

If they accumulate over and over again, eventually they find a way out. Most of the times they find a way out int the form of illness. Accumulated resentment in the body is manifested later in the form of cancer.

Repressed fear is later manifested as stress, and if you keep adding and adding stress it may manifest as almost any kind of illness, from a cough to a depression.

But there is a way out. One of the most easy and effective ones I have found is TAPPING(EFT),Which I will explain in my next post.

God Bless You.

Breaking the habit of trying to be right all the time

White-Tail-Deer-fight_900Here are some extracts of Judith E. Glaser’s blog Your Brain Is Hooked on Being Right,which was also featured at USA TODAY

http://blogs.hbr.org/cs/2013/02/break_your_addiction_to_being.html

In situations of high stress, fear or distrust, the hormone and neurotransmitter cortisol floods the brain. Executive functions that help us with advanced thought processes like strategy, trust building, and compassion shut down. And the amygdala, our instinctive brain, takes over. The body makes a chemical choice about how best to protect itself — in this case from the shame and loss of power associated with being wrong — and as a result is unable to regulate its emotions or handle the gaps between expectations and reality.

That’s partly due to another neurochemical process. When you argue and win, your brain floods with different hormones: adrenaline and dopamine, which makes you feel good, dominant, even invincible. It’s a the feeling any of us would want to replicate. So the next time we’re in a tense situation, we fight again. We get addicted to being right.

Luckily, there’s another hormone that can feel just as good as adrenaline: oxytocin. It’s activated by human connection and it opens up the networks in our executive brain, or prefrontal cortex, further increasing our ability to trust and open ourselves to sharing.

Our Brain is hooked on being right most of the time, trying constantly to defend what we believe we are or what we have: our possessions,our title, our career, our image,etc.

But if we are in auto pilot mode all of the time, how can we change that and break the habit of being right? First we need to be aware of that, we need to realize every time we are in a discussion, or just talking with someone, and we start to feel the emotion of anger in our bodies, that is the time to realize we are feeling it, because we have just hooked in defending our point of view.

After we realized that, then we need to ask ourselves this:

What if?

What if the other person is right?, What if I am not right? What would it happen if I would agree with the other person? What if I could listen with empathy?

By doing this, your break the pattern of defending yourself, and activate the Oxytocin in your body, opening your state of mind and your awareness, and experiencing bliss instead of anxiety. By doing that you are giving the first step in creating a new habit, and with every time you do it, the habit reaffirms, until you break the old habit, because an old habit that is not used, dissolves in our brain, giving space to the new habit, which instead of anxiety, gives us happiness.

Hole in the Fence

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“There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there.”

As the story tells, when we get angry, we say or do things that may hurt others, and that wound could stay forever. The principle is simple, but it may not be that easy to get rid of anger, not easy, but possible.

We are used to get angry on a daily basis, and that is because we have been doing that for many years, so by now our brain has long term connection on the emotion of anger, it even has specific chemicals which are sent to our cells every time we get angry.

Every time we got angry in the past, a connection was reinforced in our brain, then after so many times we have reinforced the emotion, the neurons in our brain have formed a long term relationship.

Basically we do not have control of our anger, it comes out of our brain naturally. But we can change that. Just as the brain has the ability to create long term relations, it also has the capacity to forget those connections. When neuron connections are not used on a daily basis, they loose their long term relationship, therefore we can rewire our brain with new connections.

The question would be, If we have no control over our anger, how can we stop getting angry and rewire our brain?

Here is the trick; every time you are aware of an emotion, the connection looses power. Every time we KNOW we reacted because we were programmed to do so, the connection get weaker.

In addition if we know the real reason because we are getting angry, our conscious mind will start to make new connections, because now we know the reason, and that will give us control of the situation in future events.

If we believe there are many things outside which can make us angry,we will find it so hard to work with the emotion, but if we understand that in essence anger is one of the simplest emotions we have, and most of the times we experience it, is only for one reason inside us and not outside, then we will be able to rewire our brains.

The reason most of the times we get mad is because we want to be right.

So next time you get angry, be aware of it, and look underneath the emotion to find out the reason you got angry, that may lead you to make a new program in your brain, and help you be in control of your emotions, without having to reprehend them. You will have a more peaceful life.

Blessing

Tapping. A “new” way to dissolve your problems

Let me start by giving the definition of TAPPING:

Tapping Thought Field Therapy, or TFT, is a fringe psychological treatment developed by an American psychologist, Roger Callahan. Its proposes that it can heal a variety of mental and physical ailments through specialized “tapping” with the fingers at meridian points on the upper body and hands.

Tapping was first used to reduce the stress levels, but eventually, some found out that when you release the tension of your body, then other things start to improve as well.

Tapping has been around for some years, but in the last couple of years, several big names in Self-Improving have been talking, teaching and writing about tapping: Jack Canfield, Cheryl Richardson, Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer, Gabrielle Bernstein among others

Tapping works in two ways.

Firs is the release of tension on the meridians, because as Callahan claimed, each perturbation we have is encoded information contained in the “thought field”( the energy field created by positive or negative thoughts). Our thought field, changes constantly, because it is connected to a particular problem, and is activated by thinking about that problem. These perturbations have a lot to do in the creation of negative emotions and that each perturbation corresponds to a meridian point on the body. Therefore in order to eliminate the emotional upset, a precise sequence of meridian points must be tapped. By tapping we unblock the flow of energy, in other words it balances the flow of vital energy in our lives.

Second is because we speak while we tap, this is a way to “give words to the emotion”, this is a simple but powerful way to transform our lives. Most of the times we feel some kind if anxiety, we are not aware about what is really the cause of that anxiety. When we “know” the origin of our anxiety, we are able to work it. If we can see the problem that is producing the anxiety, the problem starts to loose power over our bodies(remember, our brain has the ability to increase the size of any problem, by thinking about the problem and not the possible solution).

tapping_points_diagram

Nowadays, there are a lot of information about tapping, and it could be used for many problems, and not only to reduce stress. You could also find information on how to do the tapping to solve many problems:

-WEIGHT LOSS
-ANXIETY IN CHILDREN
-ANGER
-RELATIONSHIPS
-IMPROVE EYE SIGHT
-ABUNDANCE

Does it really work?

The answer for me is simple: Try it for yourself, and find out if it works your you, and if it does, then you have just found new powerful techniques that will help you live a happier and less stressed life. If it does not work for you, then you have one less thing to try in order to have a happier life.

God Bless You

For more information, you could go to:

http://www.thetappingsolution.com

Do you really love your spouse?

Do you really love your spouse?

That is the title of a video I just got from You Tube, and I decided I would write a new post about it.
Then I realized that the video speaks from itself, and that it will speak to each one personally, and each one will get something out of that video, so I decided I wouldn’t interfiere with its message, and I would let it speak directly to you.

Play Video

I only have one question for you to thing about it, after you have finished it:

What did the video tell you?

God Bless You

Do I live in a friendly or a hostile Universe?

This is the second part of Einstein’s philosophical thoughts.

Einstein who is best remembered as a scientist, found wisdom in his search for true, He said this:

“The most important decision you’ll ever make is
whether you live in a friendly universe or a hostile universe”

This literally can change the way you perceive the world, the way you perceive reality, because if you choose to live in a hostile world, then you will find a hostile world everywhere you go.

You may think these are just feeling good words, which may sound nice, and eventually may work for some issues, but they can’t change the word as it is.

Well these words are more powerful than you may think, let’s have simple example of how we perceive the “world outside”.

Try to remember when you were going to buy a car, let’s say you decide to by an specific car from a brand, almost everyday when you are on the streets, you may start noticing the same model of car you want to buy, you start noticing there are different types of the same model you want to buy, and you start encountering more and more cars of that brand than ever before.

The cars did not show up magically that day, they already were there before, but you didn’t notice them, because you didn’t think about them, but in the moment you start to think about it, they seem to show up more and more.

There is no difference with what Einstein said, (after all he is considered the brightest mind of the last century) when you choose to live in a hostile word, you start to find bad news, the people you talk to seem to tell you bad news most of the times, you find the worst drivers on your way, and bad news become a part of your life. It doesn’t mean there are not good people or good news, but you chose to live in a hostile Universe, therefore you perceive a hostile Universe everywhere you go.

The opposite is true as well, when you choose to live in a friendly Universe, you start to see opportunities everywhere you start to see more and more good news, or maybe you stop watching the news, you find good people all the time, good things start to happen. It doesn’t mean that there are no more bad news, it is just that you decide not to focus on them and start focusing in good things instead.

Trungnpa Chogyam in his book The Sacred Path of the Warrior has a very important observation:”we can actually cure ourselves of depression if we recognize that the world we have is good”

If you decide to live in a friendly world and wake every morning saying to yourself

I live in a friendly world.

Then at some point, you may find yourself in a different word, because you discovered reality is nothing else than what we perceive trough our thoughts, through the memories we have accumulated from the past, and that it is different to everyone, because everyone has chosen, even without knowing to live in a friendly or a hostile world

It is your choice

God Bless you

Gratitude

Here is this beautiful video about gratitude, about presence, about living in the now, in the only day we have: TODAY.

In the first place I thought about explaining the meaning of the content of the movie, then I realized I didn’t need to explain it, you just need to see it by yourself to experience it.

I hope you have a great day.

God Bless You

play video

The Dark Side

Inside all of us there seems to be a dark side, the one that tells us to do the things we will regret later.

There is nothing to be afraid of, as Deepak Chopra mentions in his book ” The Shadow”

” if we work closely with our own shadow instead of running away from it, we will find a peace hard to get anywhere else.”

Do you remember those movies where there isn angel in one side an a devil in the other side? The angel is telling to do the right thing, even if it will make us uncomfortable, and on the other side there is the devil, telling us to do what is not right. In the movies, most of the times the devil wins and the character ends up doing something that is wrong, even if it regrets that decision later.

We have those two sides in ourselves, one is the ego and the other one is our true Spirit, they both live inside of us, but only one is real (the Spirit) and the other one is not (the ego). And deep inside if us, we know that, we can identify what is true and what is not, and even if we listen to the other side, we know it is not right.

But we can’t fight the ego, because it is not real, and we can only fight what is real, instead of that, we can be aware of it, and choose not to listen to it. But that is not possible all the times, if it would be, then we would all be saints, and there wouldn’t be a need to be here on earth. During our lives we will certainly listen to the ego many times, but it is not a lost fight, if we are able to learn from our mistakes, then the ego starts loose its strength, and eventually we would listen to it less times than the ones we listen to the Spirit.

But there is something important we need to consider, we must not get angry to ourselves, for our mistakes, for the times we listened to the ego, If we do that, then we are listening to the ego twice.

We must learn from our mistakes, the we are reactivating the learning process that we had when we came to this world, the we would learn as much as we learned when we were toddlers, that everything was new and we learned so much because we made so many mistakes, but we learned from them always.

So next time you listen to your dark side, use it as a tool to learn from it and become a better person than you were before.

God Bless You

Infinite Patience Produces Immediate results

A quote from A Course in Miracles
Here A Course in Miracles is talking about attachments; because when you are not attached to the result, then you are more aware of the doing instead of the achieving. This means you are practicing infinite or endless patience, this patience is the patience of God. So when you have it, it means you are connected with God.

Dr. Bob Rotella a famous mind coach for several pro golfers tells us in his book “Golf is not a game of perfect”

“In golf as in life, you have to look at your target with soft eyes, confident about the result, but without any attachment, this takes away the pressure of executing a perfect shot and raises the chances of making an great shot”

Dr. Rotella is talking about the same concept as A Course in Miracles, to focus on the result, but to let it go, in other words “Let go and let God”. When you are not attached to the result, you are showing you have the confidence that you are going there, but if it does not happen, then you know that there are other perfect plans for you, and that an infinite intelligence knows better, what is best for you.

When you practice infinite patience, then you are practicing infinite Faith, not only faith in the results, but faith in God, the faith that tells you that everything is part of a perfect plan. When you practice infinite patience, you know deep inside of you that:

“Everything happens for my own sake”

This is the ultimate faith, this is the infinite faith A Course in Miracles talks about, a faith that creates immediate results, because when we are not attached to the results but focused on the target, and know inside of us that God has a perfect plan for me, then the results will show up, this way we will be able to achieve our goals better than before. Being anxious about the result, produces stress, and that takes us away from the goal and takes our attention on the thoughts we are having about it, the thoughts that most of the times are thoughts of failure instead of success. These failure thoughts we have when we are attached to our goal,create failure, because you start to focus on those thoughts instead of just be focused on the goal itself, and where your attention is focusing then the results will go on that direction.

So next time you feel anxious about a result of something you want, let go and let God.

How? Focus on the goal, and be Patience

Your Happiness Doesn’t Depend on the Place Where You Are

Imagine you are in a luxurious hotel on the beach, there is a gorgeous view from you room, you are seated in a hammock with a cold drink and in the perfect warm weather, then you receive a phone call, it is your assistant telling you you have lost everything you have in your business. You would not feel good, even though the place is a perfect place, the news make you feel miserable.
On the other hand imagine you are just walking on the street where you usually walk everyday, then you find an old friend from school that you have not seen for years, it makes you feel good, even though the landscape is the same you see everyday.
So happiness is not a matter of where you are, it doesn’t come from the outside, it comes from the inside, yes a beautiful place surely helps for you to feel good, but it doesn’t guarantee that you would be happy in that place, and if a landscape makes you feel happy it is because you are connected from the inside with the landscape, therefore you feel happiness and bliss.
I remember one day I was driving back home and then I looked at the sky and saw one of the most beautiful sunsets i’ve ever seen, the clouds were so bright, lightened by the sun, with different colors each one, there were also light beams that crossed the clouds making it look like a Renaissance painting. I felt instantly happiness and bliss, because something that beautiful touched my soul. Then I thought everyone was enjoying that sunset as I was doing, but when I looked at the others drivers I realized that everyone was on their own business, trying to answer the phone, talking, but most of them seemed to be in autopilot, not focused on their driving, the road or the sunset, they were focused on their own thoughts, they were focused on the current of thoughts we all have inside of us, then I realized that I was the only one that was aware of the master piece of God painting a gorgeous sunset, just for me.
Next time you find yourself in a beautiful place, be aware of it and enjoy it.
And next time you realized you are have unpleasant feelings, be aware of them and remember that it all comes from the inside and you have the choice to change that, regardless of the place where you are.

God Bless You